Attracting real love is what a lot of people want to work on and create in their lives. I love helping women unravel the myths and conditioning about attracting  love.  Its unfortunate that movies and Disney portray true love as some fantasy that love is so easy and just flows effortlessly. If you feel butterflies in your stomach, and instant chemistry then you have found prince charming  and you will live happily ever after!


Do you really want Prince Charming though, because he’s probably charming the pants off someone else right now!


The first place you need to start to attract real love is within yourself. Understanding what your values are, what your boundaries are, if you have any fears about receiving love, and finding acceptance for them in your heart.


Your worthiness doesn’t lie in the hands of someone else because they like you or don’t like you.  It starts and ends with how much you value yourself. You may have dated people in your past that ghosted you, lied, to you, broke your heart, and left you feeling hurt and rejected.  This doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with you, or you’re not good enough, beautiful enough, sexy enough young enough, and that you’re never going to find the right partner. It’s a myth that you have to be  a perfect person to be loved, or look and behave a certain way to attract true love.  Trying too hard to be someone you’re not will eventually backfire because it’s not aligned with your true self.


When a date or relationship doesn’t work out don’t see it as a failure or blame yourself. Instead ask yourself what did I learn from this experience, was it worthy of me, did I get my needs met, did I feel safe and seen?  Feel deep acceptance of yourself and acknowledge how the date or relationship raised your awareness and your standards of what your foundation to  attracting real love is, and what it takes to create a successful relationship


There needs to be deep love and acceptance for who you are as you are. Decide with intention how you want to express yourself, whether its  creatively, physically, emotionally and mentally. It’s  very powerful when you honour yourself and don’t question if who you are is acceptable. It will make  you feel vibrant and confident, owning your power and being fully expressed. This is very appealing to men, so don’t dumb yourself down to suit anybody.  When you dim your light, your behaviour and expression is controlled by how you think you should be to feel loved.  Doing this will attract the wrong kinds of men, who will potentially have expectations of you to  behave how you did when you first met and eventually it won’t be sustainable or enjoyable.






  1. Commit to yourself that you won’t settle for anyone that doesn’t light up your body and soul.


  1. Focus on your passions and desires what makes you feel alive and excited?


  1. Give yourself compliments each day about your looks and qualities


  1. Accept all parts of you, your fears, your vulnerabilities, your wildness


  1. Look at what you offer a partnership: love, happiness, safety, support etc


  1. Become the person you want to attract, be your best self


  1. Choose to stay centred and grounded and honour yourself when things go awry even in love


  1. Give yourself permission to shine like a Queen



Your thoughts and energy, is something people read no matter how glamourous you look or what you’re actually saying.  If you are constantly saying negative things about yourself, or your belief is there’s no good men out there or I’m never going to meet someone I want, your subconscious mind will believe this to be true and that is exactly what you will receive.  Your thoughts are very powerful, so pay attention to what you are telling yourself and what your beliefs are about love.  When you do have a negative thought about attracting real love, tell yourself something like ‘it’s going to be amazing when I meet my true love’ and notice the difference in your body and energy when you say that to yourself, it changes your whole energy field.




Visualise your ideal  true love in front of you,  he’s walking towards you with outstretched arms he’s choosing you, he desires you, your hearts are connecting with love and your souls are re-uniting. Notice how you’re feeling, as he gets closer and gives you a big hug, notice  how your body is reacting, He whispers in your ear words of love, listen to the words he is saying to you, Tell yourself  true love is mine and feel it vibrate through your whole being, feel how empowered and alive you feel.  Now Look into his eyes, is there any part of you that feels you need to hide or feel afraid to express yourself? No matter what it is accept it and  make a commitment to yourself that you will stand in your power no matter what happens.



The best partner is one  that is in high alignment with you  and is committed to the relationship on all levels. He is going to challenge you, and hold up a mirror so you can look at your truths, your shadows the parts you don’t want to face.  It can feel super uncomfortable and frustrating but this is real growth in a relationship and it will deepen your connection to be indestructible.  Your childhood wounds will get triggered, conditioning from society, family or religion will get triggered so be prepared for the deep and fulfilling work it takes to create the true  love partnership you desire.


You can learn more about How to magnetise your true love  through coaching with me here.





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